As that is one big part of why I was lead to divorce, the story made me think about how I have been coping and living.
I feel a lot of what is written.
It is amazing how your eyes finally open. You get to breathe. You Feel things in a different way.
You are able to overcome all the things that held you back, and you begin to be able to face things head on.
I don’t feel so miserable anymore not having to try to please the world, and the person who dragged me down.
I just do my thing, which is better now. Selfless. I don’t look for approval.
Furthermore, as I look back on things, I begin to realize how mis-matched we were.
I don’t think that there are any ground rules on who you choose as a mate, but I do think, sometimes we choose based on the wrong feelings, sometimes subconsciously.
I truly don’t believe that my ex and I were meant to be.
I feel that at that time in my life, I needed something. I needed stability. Somebody to bring me back to reality. Someone to help me grow.
At the time, it seemed like love. With the increasing bitterness and resentment, I knew that that leg of my journey was over.
We made three beautiful girls. All of which tested my strength in so many ways.
And here I am.
Divorced with three children, engaged and life is so different.
I know I am stronger, happier and more optimistic.
I have my good days and bad. Some days, I just have nothing to say. It feels like every cloud passing by stops above me, but I also know, that I have the choice to step out of the darkness and make a difference.
Even though it was my choice to end the marriage and move on, doesn’t mean everything is easier and perfect.
It just means now that I know my strength, and I don’t need to rely on anyone.
There is totally a sense of clarity after divorce or another traumatic event.
A test of our true selves, foreign but real. There is an adjustment from what you have been used to and what life has to offer.
Closing your eyes and willing it all to change or go away is not an option. You have to stand up and face it. Prove your worth to yourself, and finally live.